A fire in the Vice Presidential Ceremonial office was reported to be under control. While initial reports attributed the blaze to electrical or communications equipment, unnamed insiders told a different story.
"The Vice President and his advisors were in the office, planning the next 5 years of the Bush Presidency, when Satan showed up to collect the Vice President's soul.", said the source. "Satan produced a document that clearly showed that the VP had signed over his soul in exchange for 5 draft deferments, survival through a number of heart attacks, a shredding of the Bill of Rights, and ascension to being the behind the scenes de facto President of the United States. The VP muttered something about 'A deal being a deal' and ushered the Devil over to the historic view of Washington through the show window of the office. He then cold cocked the the fallen angel and strangled him with a Presidential Medal of Freedom that happened to be handy. The VP then dragged the body into a utility closet, doused it with some white lightning that he knew the President kept stashed there, and burned the evidence."
"I don't know why he had to do that.", said the aide, "It's not like he was going to miss his soul anyway."